The Strain: Episode 11 Recap

Episode opens with Shitty Child Actor- not a promising beginning…

Sir Exterminator is also Blade’s weapons designer (seriously- it’s all the weapons from Blade!).

Dementia addled Mom- she’s not even funny anymore, she’s just a loose plot thread, hanging there, dangling off the sweater of this show.

No my mom will not be OK. Happy now Shitty Child Actor? Shut up, shut up, shut up!

It took Gus two whole episodes to get home on foot.

First spectacular death of the episode! Baseball bat to the head and mouth! Seriously bro- awesome way to kill your brother.

Shut up and kill shit Eph!

Please Back-up Girlfriend, raise my Shitty Child Actor.

Yes… Leave the boy behind with Dementia Addled Mother, this will end well.

Pfffft! They still have the bread truck!

Long musical interlude involving the need for cigarettes.

Why are you looting TVs? There won’t even be networks soon.

Augustine?? WTF Gus?

Also- way to search the apartment for vampires.

Stop crying Augustine and take that bat to your mother’s head!

Saga of the cigarettes part 2!

It’s the subway tunnels from Mimic!!! (This episode is an amalgamation of about 5 other GDT movies!)

Saga of the cigarettes part 3!

Be vewy, vewy quiet- we’re hunting vampires.. ehhehehehe…

Yay! Beheading number one!!

If there’s a train coming we’re gonna- oh fuck!

So almost getting run over by the train is catalyst for a dick measuring contest…

First vampire electrocution of the episode!

Yes, Shitty Child Actor- crawl into the darkest possible place where there are SURE to be vampires in order to avoid looters. THEN go back for a stupid cell phone! He couldn’t tie his shoe without strangling himself! How did he make it to the age of ten??

More subway, more tunnels- are we there yet?

Eph should not be first into anything let alone a tiny tunnel of doom- he is useless! Why has no one noticed this yet?

“Doctor, NOOOOO”

That’s right, wander off while your friends are being attacked Eph. Good plan. Good plan…

YES! Multiple beheadings! Sir Exterminator gets an A+ in vampire hunting!

Eph get’s an F- in vampire hunting. Though he earns an A+ in stoopid.

The Muppet Master arrives! And talks, and talks, and talks and talks really slowly too…

Death by strobe light (aka they totally watched Blade 2)

Conclusion of Saga of the Cigarettes. Anti-climactic much? Also- that’s not how you hold a knife.

“Of course he tricked you!”

Old Man goes ninja on the coffin.

The tell-tale signs of vampire scat… Don’t tell me they can’t smell it.

Vampire jackpot.

Old man dies of a rage stroke…

(sorry this is so late! Made it JUST in time for the next new episodes! And OMG they are the WORST vampire hunters ever!)

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